Dreams and Dread in Nairobi
Who doesn't love a wedding?!!! Well maybe a man or woman left standing lonely at the alter but that definitely wasn't the case at this beautiful and fun-filled event!!! I'm sure there were at least 300 but more like 500 were in attendance all dressed beautifully and sporting great big smiles. I'd heard of the fabled weddings of Kenya and yearned to be a part of one some day.
Fortunately for me, my friend Irene Gathiaka was kind enough to get me an invite. Irene and I have known one another for a couple years now starting with a French-club brunch where only the 2 of us showed up. And neither being particularly proficient we switched to English alarmingly quickly considering our desire to "Parle the Francais". Since that time - I have enjoyed learning about her work as a TV news presenter and now an investment banker. She frequently puts on business nights where well-known members of the business community come to talk about business in Nairobi. They are always well attended mostly due to her excellent organizing skills and vast connections throughout the city. By all accounts - she is an amazing classy and graceful soul who I'm privileged to know .... and get an invite to this swanky doo!!!!!
So what's the fuss about I wondered as we arrived? Well the differences are not that stark given that both North American weddings and African ceremonies are rooted in Christian values and traditions. The departures are twofold in my humble opinion. First, the ceremony is as much about 2 families uniting as it is about 2 people joining in holy matrimony. Where in North American my sense is that the bride (traditionally) is given to the "new guy" so that they may start their lives together ,the African wedding seems to be more about creating a bond between families through a healthy mix of Judaeo-Christian values and African traditions. Speeches were a Ted Talk-like presentation of how to have a happy marriage. Comments were about the seasons of life and staying together no matter how challenging the times. Sage and thoughtful advice to be sure.
The second departure is the reception of the new couple where there is a plethora of great dancing and singing -- clapping and laughing. The brief clip above is the bride arriving at the reception... hence the name ☺.... and the dancing and singing just goes on and on from there. I found myself smiling broadly the entire time ... thankful for the joy that comes from new beginnings and the thoughtful invitation from Irene. Also - my thanks to the bride and groom for the invitation. I wish them the best.
One of my favorite movies of all time is 4 weddings and a funeral. Take out the brilliant performances of an all-star cast with some truly very funny and heart-warming moments -- and you still have a beautiful story. What for me makes the story so compelling and touching is the joy that comes from those finding love ...and celebrating that love with those they care about. That gives way to the absolute tragedy and misery that comes from the end of life within the same context-- leaving the viewer to wonder about joy versus sorrow and life versus death.
That slightly dark and emotional idea adequately expressed (maybe more than required), I couldn't help but feel that same sense of incomprehensible loss as the politics of Nairobi played out this week in dreadful fashion. The newspaper accounts are bad enough, but the off-line photos and stories are truly horrific. Five killed and countless wounded as the people of Nairobi came out to greet the leader of the opposing party. What fresh hell is this?
Above a protester lies dead while smoke billows from a police riot vehicle in the background. This is near my office in East Nairobi -- though my team and I wisely chose to stay home for the day rather than be caught up in the chaos known as peaceful political protest. At least 5 lie dead after Fridays unfortunate events. How many Mothers - Brothers - Fathers - Sons - Daughters and others are grieving today? And what is the future of this country where the welcoming back of the leader of the opposition ends in death, tragedy and misery for so many.
I appreciate that the issues are as contentious as they are tangled and complicated. But surely the violence must stop. Please -- I beg those who have the power to send these poor souls to their death find new ways to solve their differences. Let there be more weddings and less funerals.....
Thanks for reading ......Layno!!